Goddess, I love this book. It's been two years since I read it, but it still has a profound effect on me. Tonight, Tom and I went to bed early (9) and I slept fitfully, at best. So, I woke up a few minutes ago compelled to talk about this book. I am sure a lot of the desire comes from a long conversation that I had with my Mom today, and the rest of the desire comes from some very strange dreams I had this evening.
If you have not read this book, please do not read this blog. I am not going to tell you the story, per se. I am going to talk about my take on the story. The reason I don't want you to read this is because Anita Diamant does such an incredible job of taking you on this strife-filed journey through the dark ages, all the while giving you all of the pieces to this puzzle. At the end, she amazingly puts all of the pieces together and shows you the glorious things that this strife-filled journey can result in. So, if you haven't read it, go on to something else, please.
I started reading this book, at behest of one of my dearest friends, about two years ago, just prior to my wedding. I read it through the time we spent in Vegas for the wedding and then on the trip from the chapel to my Grandmother's bedside at the hospice. I finished the book whilst sitting with my Memee the last day of her life. I knew when I finished that book that something much greater than myself had directed me to read that book during this transition in my life. I would not have appreciated the time I spent with Memee prior to her death without this book by my side. I would not have realized what Memee *gave* to my life without this book. I am glad I realized that gift before she past, when I could still thank her, face-to-face.
Men carry the names, the land, the jewels, the livestock, the businesses, the public legacy of the family. From generation to generation they create an identity for the family. Women carry something much different. We carry the history, the love, the strength, and the pain. Our legacy is often that of darkness, something so intangible.
I know nothing of the hardships of being a man, so everything I am writing is based solely upon assumption. A lot of what I am going to say is very much a generalization and probably not so applicable in today's society as it was in aeons past.
Men often function on their own. They don't rely specifically upon other people to get them through certain events. Women have to have other women in their lives. When a woman gives birth, she has to have someone to help care for the other children, look after the house and the family, etc. etc. If there were a problem during childbirth, we rely upon another woman to care for our child.
We are a piece of every woman we ever spent time with. Our mothers, grandmothers, aunts, cousins, sisters and daughters shape us into the women we are. Sometimes our stories are not told, but that is OK. Our stories will always live on in the women whose lives we help form. My grandmother's strength will live on in me until I am able to pass it to another woman, and so on, and so forth.
So, all of the land, money, jewels, and names can go to the men, that is fine with me. What I have inherited is much more valuable. The strength to carry my head high and cherish my life is worth so very much more, to me.
** This all sounds so very biased. It isn't. I don't mean to downplay the very important role of men in our families, lives and histories. Especially today, because men have assumed many of the roles that our sisters and mothers would have assumed just 50 years ago.
